I’ve decided it was time to get into politics.
No, I’m not running for office, and I’m not going to just share articles without reading them on social media. I’m instead going to be working on helping create and establish a new, credible third party to help solve America’s problems. To do this, we need to address why we are in this situation politically. The answer is simple….people.
We need a party that is pure-hearted, friendly but tough, and willing to compromise on important issues.
To accomplish this, I present to you, the Doggo Party.
Dogs are much better than most people (if that statement offends you please email me at email@example.com). So let’s address the important issues one at a time.
1) Healthcare – dogs always want to help you when you are sick. They will snuggle up with you and make sure you are okay.
2) Deficit – Dogs understand that you cannot eat out of an empty bowl when the bowl is empty, you must wait for it to be filled up again. Same goes for the treasury.
3) Territorial disputes – dogs have long established policies for territory disputes which could be implemented with minimal disruptions.
4) Bipartisanship – dogs will always come to the table to discuss issues, especially if treats are involved.
5) Foreign policy – Do you think any crackpot dictators would want to deal with Milly.
Just ask yourself, would you rather a panel of nine humans make rulings based on laws, or a panel of 9 dogs. If you chose the former, you are wrong.
Do you think dogs would complain about Gerrymandering if they lost an election? No, they wouldn’t.
I hope we can count on your support as we develop our new party, and we are hereby putting the other political parties on notice. You can get on board with the duggo train, or you can get run over.